Giving it 110%

I’ve always hated that phrase. It is so impossible to accomplish. The maximum attention  you can ever give any task or person is 100%. Physics does not allow for more. My opinion of this is that I give 100% all the time. Some days my 100% is less than other days. Lifting weights showed me this reality. There were days I could lift far greater weights than other days. The difference? My body just wasn’t always in top form, neither was my mind.

When a supervisor tells me to give 110%, it is like a slap in the face. In my mind, it is like they are telling me that I wasn’t giving it my all yesterday and now they want me to quit screwing around and get to work. I just simply can’t.

Why are we talking about this? What does it have to do with diabetes? Its the same principle. I give my diabetes 100% of my time and attention. I have to. If I don’t it will kill me, plain and simple. The similarity comes that, as with any other part of my life, I have highs and lows. Some days I feel up to the task and do well and others I feel fatigued or am distracted by other events. I just can’t give it the same effort each day. My Aunt Phyllis passed away recently and well let’s just say things have not quite gotten back to normal yet. I still give it 100% each day but that 100% is less than what it was before. Like my book says,  I am an imperfect diabetic. I make mistakes, just the one though, each day. Who am I kidding, I make tons of mistakes each day and I have to deal with the consequences.

I’m willing to bet there are many out there like me that make a few mistakes each day. You just have to teach yourself to accept that you are not God and will make them. Try to learn from them. A certain food spike your blood sugar? Avoid it or eat less of it next time. Your insulin ratio not correct at night? Change it. Here is where I go off the rails and doctors hate it. If I see a pattern form in my reading I make a change. I try to let them know but I’m not going to wait for a day or two to get an answer back. Think about the timing of this. I know what is going on in my life each moment of the day. I don’t mean like planning ahead as in a schedule. I can attest to that not working, at all.

I get to work and find out I am going to be flipping 100 pound parts for next 8 hours. Well I need to eat a little extra to combat the resulting lows. At break when I eat lunch, I’ll take less insulin to avoid eating so much extra food. I am not going to call the doctor to ask if I should or not because it would do no good. By the time they get the call the next morning, pull up my Decom data (didn’t think about that did you), and make an educated guess on how much or even if to change it, it is too late.

Sorry, long way to the point. The point is I always give 100%, to everything. Its the way I was raised and I whole heartedly believe in that philosophy. I’m not sure I could stop if I wanted to. My parents raised me this way. The only part of this that changes is my 100%. If I have a bad day, I try to keep my chin as high as I can because there will be a better day later. I’m not naïve enough to think it will be right the next day. I’m not going to loose all my money and the next day win the lottery, wouldn’t that be nice. I will keep plugging away at the game that is my life until it balances out. Call me aggressive but I will beat it into submission to make to the next day if I have to. That is giving 100%.

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